• Adam Chapman

    In A Day Before Cliche

    Many people ponder the benefits (and possible dangers) of time travel. I’m sure like me, you’ve probably at one time or another debated what historical event you would travel back to given the power to do so.  Some people will answer with things that would gift them immense riches. Things lik “I would have invested in Bitcoin when it was cheap”. This sort of thing is normally quite popular because we’re all greedy, selfish SOBs.  Others amongst us lust for culturally iconic events such as seeing The Beatles or being at Woodstock. Of course, these sorts of legendary concerts are normally tinted with rose coloured spectacles. I mean Woodstock was…

  • Sif

    It’s Natural History, Dahling

    Screen whores. We’re all guilty in some degree of partaking in the world’s newest profession, from the shameless full-on prostitution performed by reality TV stars to occasionally turning the odd trick in a friend’s video or attempt at whacky party photography. It’s our chance at grabbing what we think is a slice of the immortality pie, to be remembered forever; or at least as long as this internet fad lasts or the world implodes due to the weight of stupidity humanity revels in. It’s not my pint of beer but in essence it seems harmless enough to shove your face into a lens and spout shite until you pass out…

  • Adam Chapman

    It’s The End Of The World As We Snow It

    It’s here, oh my good golly gracious it’s here. As Game Of Thrones warned viewers for many years “Winter is coming” and it’s only just gone and turned up in physical form today.  Of course I’m talking about the blanket of snow that’s been laid down across most of the UK. Of course for many of us it’s only about 2-4 inches and the snow’s depth is around the same (The one and only dick joke you’ll find on TBP I’m better than that) but already it’s already reaching apocalyptic levels for the British Isles.  Now, it’s no secret that us Brits are terrible when it comes to a bit…

  • Adam Chapman

    “It’s Fake Isn’t It?”

    I spent the first years of my life in the 1990s. This was a glorious time of oversized clothes, the beginning of widely available internet and an oversaturation of American sitcoms.  The thing that sticks with me most from the 90s though? The Monday night wars in wrestling. WWE (named WWF at the time before legal troubles) and WCW competed for viewership. Both companies pushed the boundaries of what could be achieved within the ring, developed storylines that verged on the ridiculous and grew talents like The Rock, Stone Cold Steve Austin, Goldberg and Sting, turning them into iconic superstars by the end of the decade. Now as an impressionable…

  • Sif

    Tax Has Never Tasted So Sweet

    The sugar tax on soft drinks came into being nearly a year ago (April 2018) and it is estimated it will raise approximately £240M at the end of its first 12 months of application. It was expected to be double that figure initially but many manufacturers changed their drinks recipes, dropping the amount of sugar used, thus avoiding the levy. This tax was designed to be passed onto the consumer in totality to bring about a change in people’s consumption habits and therefore make for healthier lifestyles and lower childhood obesity. In addition to that the monies raised are to be used (allegedly) to fund newer and more PE equipment…

  • Adam Chapman

    I Know You Are But What Am I?

    When I was around 4 and a half years old, my older brother and I were blessed with a little sister joining the family. I think a stork dropped her off, that’s how Disney films explained a new sibling suddenly being in our house. It doesn’t really explain why my mum suddenly expanded in size over the previous nine months but I didn’t need to know, ah the naivety of youth. Anyway you’re probably wondering why I’m giving you an outline on the amount of brothers and sisters I have, well put very simply, as the middle child I became amazing at being a bloody pain in the nether region.…

  • Sif

    To Follow the Trend or Bucket?

    The ‘bucket list’ is something of a new thing with me, I certainly never came across the phrase in my youth, and some suggest it is a phenomenon linked to the 2007 movie of the same name. In its purest form it is a list made by someone who knows they are going to die soon and it is a last minute dash to achieve things of note or long held desire before it is too late. Although more commonly of recent times these lists are being made by those who don’t even know Death’s address let alone being anywhere near his door. Basically, to my mind, this new fashion…

  • Adam Chapman

    According To Social Media I’m The Worst Person In The World

    I knew it, I only bloomin’ knew it but now I can’t deny it anymore. I’m afraid to say if you’re reading this, you’re reading the words of the worst person on the planet.  How has this come to light I hear you ask? Was it because of that time I laughed at a seagull stealing a toddler’s lunch? Quite possibly, but I’m sure you would have let out a little chuckle if you had seen that.  Was it due to that time I found a fiver on the floor and didn’t report it as lost goods, I doubt it and I’m around 99% sure that no one ever has…

  • Sif

    Eye of Newt and Toe of Frog

    It’s shit when some waste of DNA wrongs you, nicks something from you or damages something you own for no other reason than they can and so they do. Petty crimes like lifting your push iron, keying your car or nicking your wallet, the latter being the event inspiring the writing of this rant tonight. In the scheme of things it’s no big deal, despite usually incurring at least some financial loss, but that does not mean it won’t ruin your day and tilt your psychological balance for some time to come. It also doesn’t mean you can’t hate the little fucker and dream of what you’d like to do…

  • Adam Chapman

    Crazi Spell-lingz

    Before I start I have to give a shout out to a fellow TBP writer.  Sif pointed out briefly in his article “Easy Peasy Lemon Squeezy” the annoyance of stupidly kooky spellings of otherwise simple words for the effect of…well I don’t really know what.  So with this article fresh in my brain and a slight bit of motivation to go on a walk, I set off into the streets of Liverpool. Lo and behold, it’s bloomin’ everywhere.  Such an example was of a new flat development being knocked up under the name of “Legacie Apartments”. I’ll point out the bleeding obvious here and suggest they are going for “Legacy”.…